Blast From the Past #1: Indiana's Abnormal Weather Patterns

The following is a blog I composed on MySpace. Its the first of a long series of blogs I'll be introducing to this new blog of mine. This begins to explain my distain with Indiana and why I was so glad to leave.

*Originally posted on July 17th, 2006 on myspace*

Indiana is damn near declaring a state of emergency due to an incredible change in the weather patterns. Recently, an apparenty unprecidented change has occurred in the natural climate of the midwest. To inform people about this freakish shift, weather stations and the national weather service have issued a Hot Weather Advisory for Indiana. Temperatures are climbing above the 90 degree mark, and to make sure Hoosiers are prepared for this change, the two above listed entities are suggesting these tips:

1.) If you feel thirsty or have a dry mouth, drink a cool beverage (preferably water). If you are exposed to warmth for too long without liquids, you could be prone to dehydration.

2.) To cool yourself off, try to find some shade. You might want to try to stay inside.

3.) When driving, be sure to roll down your windows or turn on your air conditioning. Driving can be quite uncomfortable in warmer conditions if one of these two options are not implemented.

4.) Swimming in pools or lakes can help to significantly reduce body temperatures. If neither is available to you, try a cold bath or shower to "beat the heat."

5.) As always, dress for the weather: Wearing sweaters and long pants is not advised. T-shirts and shorts prevent heat from being trapped against the body, which allows you to stay cooler.

Ok... Its all common sense. But this shit was really on the Indiana 5 o'clock news. Do we really have people that are that dense? If you're running on a hot day, your body should say "Hey, its kinda hot, and i'm kinda thirsty. You're not going to make your ideal bathing suit figure, so lets get some water, ok?"

I think survival of the fittest no longer applies: There are too many people helping the weak ones subsist until they breed... and they will breed...a lot.... Which ensures future generation of dimly lit lightbulbs to shine on for quite awhile to come.
Oh. By the way: Excessive exposure to the sun causes sunburn. Try some sunblock. Sunblock, for those who don't know, BLOCKS THE SUN'S HARMFUL RAYS.

*sigh*